Rough around the edges.

Friday, December 23, 2011

2012: A Year in Preview

As this year winds down we begin, as we always do, looking to the next one. 2011 saw the release of several big films and the summer blockbuster season was a notable improvement over 2010. Looking ahead to 2012, I see a few films to be excited about, but many more that cause me to question my continuously wavering faith in American cinema.

The following is a list of some of the biggest and most anticipated films coming out in 2012. They are listed in the order they are scheduled to release in with the expected release date and a small write-up containing my opinion of how each film will perform and be received.

Underworld: Awakening - The fourth film in the endlessly disappointing franchise, Awakening marks the return of Kate Beckinsale as vampire Selene. This time, however, she and her fellow vampires are teaming up with their mortal enemies, the lycans, to take on the humans threatening to eradicate them. I guess when you've exhausted all other sequel options (including the ever annoying prequel), having the two opposing forces team up to take on a third opposing force is your one remaining option. Given that these films have never been anything special I expect this to be no different. Release date: Jan. 20
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1011654169/

Haywire - This film might not be hot on anyone's 'to watch' list, but I'd advise you to reconsider. Director Steven Soderbergh has never confined himself to one genre and this has both worked for and against him. His most recent film, Contagion, was well-received critically and did O.K. for itself at the box office. Haywire is the story of a female CIA operative who is betrayed by her superiors and vows to take them all out. Pretty well-tread stuff, here, but if the trailer is anything to go by, we're in for some innovative action and the chance to see a total unknown actress waste some big names like: Michael Fassbender, Ewan McGregor, Antonio Banderas and Channing Tatum. Release date: Jan. 20
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi405511705/


Journey 2: The Mysterious Island - I'll keep this short and sweet. Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson is shipwrecked on an island with, among others, Vanessa Hudgens and Luis Guzman. Weird things happen. Michael Caine shows up. It's a sequel to a film that starred Brendan Fraser. Need I say more? Release date: Feb. 10
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi4230192665/

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance - Three things: it's a sequel, it's a sequel to a Nicolas Cage movie, it's a sequel to the worst Marvel superhero movie ever made (including The Punisher and Ang Lee's Hulk), which once again stars Nicolas Cage. It's like they are actively trying to make you not want to watch this movie. Release date: Feb. 17
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2556337689/

Wanderlust - This is more of a personal entry. Wanderlust is a film from David Wain, the director of the sleeper comedy hit Role Models and the cult comedy hit Wet Hot American Summer. On top of that, he cowrote the film with Ken Marino, a fellow member of the sketch comedy troupe The State. The film stars Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston as a work-obsessed married couple who are thrust into the unfamiliar world of communes where they meet a harum of interesting characters like hippies, experimental drug users and nudists. If the trailer doesn't sell you then you should see a doctor about replacing your funny bone. Release date: Feb. 24
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2251464217/

Mirror Mirror - There are two different types of Snow White coming out this year. One has Snow White as a warrior out to conquer a kingdom. That ain't this one. This Snow White is so pure and so G rated it makes any Disney film look like Steve McQueen's Shame. The film stars up-and-comer Lily Collins as Snow White and Julia Roberts as the Evil Queen. I don't actually know what to say about this film other than it's from director Tarsem Singh, who has two completely awful films (The Cell, Immortals) and one O.K. film (The Fall). Mirror Mirror will probably find its way into the former category. Also, if no one else will ask it then I will, why is Julia Roberts still acting? Release date: Mar. 16
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3708919321/

The Hunger Games - Sure, there are other 'kind of blockbusters' coming out before, but The Hunger Games is the first true blockbuster of the year. Based on the first book of the immensely popular fantasy series, the film follows one of today's hottest young stars, Jennifer Lawrence, as Katniss Everdeen, who is thrust into competition with 23 other teens to win food for her district. I have not read the books yet, but people have been expressing excitement over the trailer since its release. Given that film adaptations of books have a hard time grasping what made the book so enjoyable, it's tough to call how this film will turn out. It will, however, dominate at the box office for sure. Release date: Mar. 23
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2402131481/

Wrath of the Titans - It's a sequel to a depressingly bad action film. I think I already did this write up for Ghost Rider. Just replace Nicolas Cage with Sam Worthington. Good night. Release date: Mar. 30
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3846741529/

The Avengers - And here we come to the first summer blockbuster of the year. The last 10 years of superhero cinema have been leading to this. Here we are presented with Joss Whedon's vision of a majority of the Marvel hero collection getting together to save the world from evil. This film looks good and it appears to have a solid story. The only problem: Loki. Why would you pull the villain from one of the bottom five Marvel superhero movies to return in what was supposed to be the superhero movie to end all superhero movies? There are so many more villains out there with so much more potential than Thor's completely unimpressive brother. Release date: May 4
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3488652825/

Battleship - Are you kidding me? We've taken to adapting board games into movies? And as if this isn't bad enough, they are also working on a Ouija board movie and a Monopoly movie. I won't even dignify this movie with a proper write-up. You don't need half a brain to know this will be the worst film of the year. Release date: May 18
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2203360793/

Men in Black III - The third film in a series of underwhelming films. I don't care if it stars Tommy Lee Jones and Josh Brolin. Give it up, Barry Sonnenfield. We know these films are your only source of income, but please, for the sake of the universe, leave it alone. And yes, there is a pun in that last sentence and it was very much so intended. Release date: May 25
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2656345625/

Snow White and The Huntsman - Now we come to the other Snow White. The one played by Kristen Stewart. While I will say this is the more ambitious of the two projects and this one has a higher chance of success, I don't plan for much here. We see Charlize Theron taking a turn as the Evil Queen, but let's be honest, the only people going to see this movie are those who are die hard Bella Swan fans. But, if memory serves, no one jumped to form a Team Bella when people couldn't decide who they would rather get infected by, the vampire or the werewolf. Once again, there's a bit of tongue-in-cheek in that last sentence. I'll probably see it for the action scenes, but be warned, it pairs a director who has done literally nothing else in his entire career (either he's somebody's son or he slept with the right producer) and a writer who wouldn't have this job is he hadn't won a contest. Release date: June 1
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1982242329/

Prometheus - This is the summer film that I am most excited about. Prometheus is the prequel to Ridley Scott's (who also directed this) 1979 thriller Alien. It follows Michael Fassbender and Charlize Theron as they look for the origins of man on Earth. It also tells the story behind the mysterious Space Jockey viewed at the beginning of Alien. I'm told the xenomorphs (the aliens) are much bigger and menacing in this film. Given that Scott is so determined to remake his entire back catalog I see this as his test run before trying to do another Blade Runner, which, if I'm counting correctly, would bring all existing cuts up to six. Release date: June 8
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2035129881/

Jack the Giant Killer - It's a retelling of the Jack & The Beanstalk folk tale as told through the eyes of Bryan Singer, who usually hits his mark every time. He wowed audiences with The Usual Suspects and did a justice to the first two X-Men movies (he didn't direct the third). It also stars upcoming British star and Skins alum Nicholas Hoult. I expect this to do well. Release date: June 15
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi4081294873/

G.I. Joe: Retaliation - Think of this as my write-up for Journey 2: The Mysterious Island, but instead of getting shipwrecked, The Rock fights the Cobra Commander and his allies. Enthralling stuff. Also, swap out the Brendan Fraser cameo for Bruce Willis. Release date: June 29
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1448713753/

The Amazing Spiderman - This is the first of two July blockbusters and while I expect good things from both, I expect less from this one. With a crazy history battling development Hell, The Amazing Spiderman is a reboot of the film series, which ended four years ago. The timing seems appropriate. Also, that was a joke. This series looks to focus more on Peter Parker the man than on Spiderman the hero and if the trailer is anything to go by, it has a much darker feel than the previous series. Release date: July 3
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2178784281/

The Dark Knight Rises - I don't know if there's anything I could say to make you not go see this movie, and I wouldn't even try if there were. In fact, if I could make you see this movie more intently I would. It is the final chapter in Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy and is competing with The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey for the most anticipated film of the year. The main villain this time is Bane, and if the comics Nolan used as inspiration are anything to go off of, we might see Bruce Wayne either dead or severely crippled, opening the door for someone new to accept the Dark Knight mantle. Only time will tell. Now, if only time would go faster. Release date: July 20
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi2823134745/

The Expendables 2 - I mean, the first one was O.K. But, if you think they sold that film on its star power, watch the trailer for this film's line-up. I bet this film's biggest audience will be people looking to gather new material for a slur of new Chuck Norris jokes. Yes, he's in it. Release date: Aug. 17
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi727621145/

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 - A bullshit conclusion to a bullshit franchise. Does more need to be said? Release date: Nov. 16

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey - If any film can be said to have experience development Hell, it's this one. First it'sa Peter Jackson project meant to take root right after he had finished up work on The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Then, he got bogged down doing a decent King Kong remake and a terrible book adaptation in The Lovely Bones. Enter Guillermo del Toro who had achieved success with Pan's Labyrinth and whose adaptation of Hellboy was all right. He has an excellent eye for the fantastic and seemed like the appropriate replacement for Jackson. Fast forward a fews years. Still nothing. Exit del Toro, re-enter Jackson. Jump ahead about a year. Finally, things are underway and a year from now, the fruits of this labor will make themselves known. The Hobbit might be the most anticipated film of the year, but I'd still give that title to The Dark Knight Rises. Even so, it has the potential to be just as grand as its succeeding trilogy. Be patient, folks. Release date: Dec. 14
Trailer - http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1699192345/

Django Unchained - This is more of a personal entry. I've always been a fan of Quentin Tarantino and I couldn't be more excited for this film. It's a spaghetti Western set in the pre-bellum South and stars Jamie Foxx as Django, a slave freed by German bounty hunter Dr. King Schulz (Christoph Waltz). They are on a mission to save Django's wife from evil plantation owner Calvin Candie (Leonardo DiCaprio). Also in the film are: Samuel L. Jackson, Sasha Baron Cohen, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Kurt Russell. Expect blood, gore, action, awesome characters and incredibly well-developed dialog, as per usual. Release date: Christmas Day, 2012

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